a personal note ::
i’m a little late posting this week as i’ve been swept up into a whirlwind & distracted by some personal inexpectations. i’ve been struggling with the idea of disclosing too much since it’s completely personal – but this blog is completely inspired by the way my week played out so i’m going to share some.
in short for those who aren’t aware, i’m 7 months pregnant and had been thriving. i woke up to some scary setbacks on sunday and spent the following 4 days in the hospital. baby and i are doing great, that strong little guy seems to be completely uneffected by the crazy week! i am physically feeling great as well but am left struggling with all of the emotions surrounding an order of “bedrest” which include but are not limited to the fear of stagnancy, atrophy when approaching one of the most important physical jobs of my life – labor – and mental weakness. my other overwhelming feeling is guilt – everyday i am so lucky that this baby boy is safely staying put to grow strong…if this prescription is truly best for him – than no questions asked, i’m on board. also, there are so many people who would give anything in the world for several weeks or months of non-movement compared to the lifetime they are dealing with. i should be ashamed for letting it effect me negatively at all.
i tease it because… ::
so during the mental trip of this week, i can’t stop thinking about my taste with experiencing sudden non-movement. as a dancer, i hit the floor and MOVE not only for physical reasons but because of the mental outlet and endorphin release i constantly crave. it is my art and my voice. it always has been – either in my head or my body, i am constantly dancing. this temporary “silence” of that voice has made me even further appreciate the importance of dance to my life.
dance it out ::
when i was an early teenager and began to dance with the roxey ballet and mill ballet school of new jersey, the directors mark and melissa roxey created the most amazing program called “wheels in motion”. we worked with the matheny medical and education center to provide dance therapy to those dealing with extreme physical disabilities. participating in this was one of the things i have done in my life that i am most proud of. i was lucky to have been a part, i can only hope that my energy helped the people i worked with a fraction of the amount of what i took from the experience. it was amazing to see what dance – whether it meant the simplest stretch of an arm or spin of a wheelchair – could do to lift a spirit.
so….i’m getting more and more driven as the week carries on and i’m sitting with my thoughts. i’ve watched countless “teasers” come into the studio stressed off of a bad day – and leave in mental and physical bliss. i read the “i tease it because…” wall and am inspired by the endless reasons tease is therapeutic. i don’t know quite what my path will be yet – but i will absolutely be dedicating energy towards a program of “tease” therapy – offering dance therapy in the best and most expressive way that i know how. i’m motivated to find a group of women who are in great need of an outlet. the possibility that “tease therapy” could be the physical voice for even one life truly in need is my inspiration.
so i guess this blog is more the start to an idea and my commitment to something greater. i’m very excited for the future & further inspiration and definition on what exactly “tease therapy” can be.